Death is an emotional experience for both the dying person and the people around them.
This can make it incredibly difficult and awkward to know what to say to a dying loved one.
It is very common to wonder “What do I say to someone who is dying?”
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or How will I know when Ive said enough?
take a stab at focus on subjects that will provide the person with comfort and reassurance.
You should also follow their lead and let them talk about the things they want to talk about.
It may also be easier to bring up difficult subjects in a letter.
For this reason, a letter may not be the right place to discuss grievances or negative subjects.
What Words Comfort a Dying Person?
“Talking about death will cause upset.”
Its a common belief that talking about someones illness orimpending deathwill only upset them.
Many people are surprised to find that a dying person wants to talk about whats happening to them.
Talking about death allows a loved one to express unspoken fears and concerns.
Oftentimes, sharing these feelings with someone who listens fully and without distress can help reduce pent-up anxieties.
“Talking about death will make things worse.”
Some people believe that talking about death will actually make it happen sooner.
They may think that discussing death will stress the dying person and could bring about aheart attackorstroke.
This belief is entirely unfounded.
(“Knowing will kill them!")
While talking about death can be stressful, it can also be therapeutic and healing for everyone involved.
Of course, not everyone will want to talk about death or dying.
Thats okay, too.
Let compassion guide the conversation, remembering this is not about you.
“Talking about everyday things is hurtful.”
This belief prevents many people from discussing the day to day aspects of our lives.
If they are an avid sports fan, thats not necessarily going to go away.
“Silence is stressful for everyone.”
Some people will even use the fear of awkwardness to avoid seeing a dying friend.
(“I don’t know what to say.")
In fact, the one thing better than being a talker is being a listener.
There are things it’s possible for you to do to encourage conversation.
Sit at the same level as your loved one with no barriers between you.
Lean forward and give them your full attention without folding your arms or fidgeting.
In short,be there.
Its also important to know that not all silence needs to be awkward.
A calming physical presence is often all a dying person needs or wants.
Try reminiscing about your past experiences with that person or simply listen to what they have to say.
Don’t be afraid to talk about death if that’s what your loved one wants to do.
Remember that it’s normal for them to express strong feelings and emotions.
