Each family is connected, bonded, and supportive in different ways.
Some family dynamics are considered healthy, and others are more concerning.
Enmeshment takes place if family members are emotionallyreactiveto one another and wholly intertwined in an unhealthy way.
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Within a family system, the bonds between family members can affect children’s emotional development.
In an enmeshed relationship, there is no emotional independence or separation between the parent and child.
This can lead to a child’s inability to form individual thoughts and behaviors separate from the parent.
Both are considered unhealthy and can affect a child’s development and well-being.
There is also a healthy separation between parents' relationship with each other and their relationship with their children.
With enmeshed relationships, parents rely on their children for emotional support.
They also foster an environment where their children excessively depend on them.
In doing so, they don’t help their children develop independence.
This is how the generational pattern continues.
The new parent is looking to fill the unmet needs from their own childhood.
They raise their children the only way they know how, which is withoutboundariesor independence among family members.
Those in an enmeshed relationship will likely struggle to balance time together and time apart.
Flexibility refers to a person’s or couple’s ability to handle challenges and change.
In enmeshed relationships, the ability to handle change is often complicated and disruptive.
People in enmeshed relationships may also have difficulty supporting each other and celebrating their differences.
They are likely to decide based on what they think the other person wants rather than their needs.
Boundary Setting
Enmeshment is a form of emotional control that is achieved through manipulation.
This makes it challenging to form boundaries, and boundaries are mostly nonexistent in enmeshed relationships.
When learning to set boundaries, it can help to start slowly.
Tip for Boundary Setting
Setting boundaries includes talking about them with those you are closest to.
Know your boundaries clearly and stick to them even when you get pushback.
Practicing mindfulness can help bring attention to your interactions with others and how you feel about them.
This could be a sign of an enmeshed relationship.
Therapy
Recognizing the impact of growing up in an enmeshed family can be difficult.
Setting boundaries can be hard, as can saying no and finding a sense of self and identity.
Therapycan benefit parents concerned about continuing the pattern of enmeshment in their own families.
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Enmeshment: Definition, family systems, & psychology.
