Here are a few tips for success when talking with someone who is living with dementia.
Dont Infantilize the Person
Dont talk down to the person or treat them like an infant.
This is sometimes called “elderspeak” and it’s got to go.
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Have you ever observed how people talk to babies?
They might use a high pitched tone and get close to the babys face.
While this is appropriate for infants, its not fitting for communicating with adults.
Use Their Names and Preferred Titles
Learn what the persons preferred name is and use it.
Be careful with using “honey,” “sweetheart” or similar terms.
You may mean it genuinely in affection, but it can also come across as demeaning or patronizing.
Knowing how someone responds to physical touch is important.
Personal touch is important and can be an effective way to communicate that you care.
Use a clear, normal tone of voice to start a conversation with someone.
Speaking in a slightly lower register can also help if someone has a hearing problem.
Also, dont talk about the person as if they’re not there.
They might understand more than you give them credit for, so convey your respect by addressing them directly.
This might make you less comfortable physically, but it will facilitate a more comfortable and respectful conversation.
Avoid Interrogating
Limit your questions to just a few.
For their sake, avoidpet peeveswhen spending time with someone who is living with Alzheimer’s.
Frequently Asked Questions
Nonverbal communication is essential when speaking to someone with dementia.
Before speaking, allow the person to see your face to know who is talking.
Keep your face and body language relaxed and positive.
Do not interrupt a person with dementia or have a go at finish their sentences.
Be patient and calm.
Speak slowly and clearly, but do not raise your voice or talk down to someone.
When talking to someone with dementia, do not remind them they have memory problems.
If they forget something you told them, pretend that you forgot to mention it earlier and apologize.
Do not take a stab at reason with someone with dementia and avoid arguing.
Do not confront them about memory issues.
Avoid asking many questions, such as about recent events or if they remember your name.
Most importantly, do not take it personally if they do not remember something or become frustrated.
Murphy P, Shallice T, Robinson G, et al.Impairments in proverb interpretation following focal frontal lobe lesions.Neuropsychologia.
2012;6. doi:10.3389/fnhum.2012.00122
Alzheimer’s Association.Communication and Alzheimer’s.
Alzheimer’s Society.How to communicate with a person with dementia.
